Worn. Out.

So. Last night, after the Kraken spent an hour yapping to her dolls in her bed, the summoning began.

"Momma"
"MomMA"
"MOMMA!"

Followed by....

"GorGON" (uh, that's Momma to you, you little weasel)

This has been going on for several months, mind, so being paged from above is nothing new. I don't honestly know what to do about it. The child has a bladder of iron, so she pees right before bed, and then saves another one up for about 1/2 hour later, then another 1/2 hour after that it's time to drop an adult sized dump from her petite behind. I can't very well not let her go to the bathroom, but the game is getting a little old.

You see, the Kraken is 3 1/2. And she is "almost" ready to give up her nap. Meaning she really needs about an hour mid-day, but not the 2 hour nap she takes at school because hey, it's dark and there's nothing else to do. So, that two hour nap is enough to kick her into overdrive in the evenings, and combined with her own determination to not miss any of the completely hypothetical action around here after she goes to her room, she simply refuses to go to sleep. Until around 10 PM. Even if she is so. tired. she can barely keep her eyes open.

This week, we have an exciting new twist. Instead of just happily yammering away up there until she finally keels over with exhaustion, she has decided to take the bull by the horns and simply refuse to go to bed in the first place. Her technique? Screaming AT THE TOP OF HER LUNGS. This has happened 4 out of the last 5 nights. I wish I could say we had been handling it well, but we haven't. We alternate between stomping out of her room and desperately trying to cajole her into better behavior. The last two nights we have tried the "walking away and letting her make an ass of herself" technique, which involves a lot of going back up the stairs and physically hauling her screaming, kicking, biting form back into the bedroom and closing the door while she screams so loudly that she chokes on her own saliva. Good times.

Wish I could say the duration had improved using this new exciting technique, or our stress level, but alas, not so much. Last night this went on for over an hour. Tonight, about the same. At least last night I managed to get her to use the bathroom and brush her teeth before this started - tonight we had no such luck. The child's will is as strong as her bladder. In fact, tonight's meltdown was preceded by a 40 minute screaming fit caused because I refused to give her something she wanted until she asked her father for it, and said please, because she was an ass to him the first time she asked. "Please, Daddy, can I have some yogurt?" was all she had to say, and rather than say it she screamed, sobbed, beat the floor, told me Ursula the Sea Witch had stolen her voice, asked me to ask her father for her, and in general acted like the Fonz trying to say he was sorry. She simply could not swallow her pride, even to obtain something she desperately wanted. It took 40 minutes, a bucket of tears, and even when she finally did it she refused to make eye contact.

So, it's 12:34 AM. I've got a kid up there out cold with a bladder full of delicious strawberry drinkable yogurt, who hasn't peed since about 5:45 PM. What are the odds I'm getting a full night's sleep?